When I began law school, I had the grand idea that I would document my journey. I really wish I had thus far. By far, my entries would be drenched in the pain of learning law and realizing that I no longer am able to have a life outside of law school. However, I feel like so much has happened... that is not true. Perhaps my brain is just growing at rapid speed and the lens at which I look at the world is changing.
It is.
My birthday was this weekend and that added a bit of spice to the mix. I spent the majority of the day alone and then went bowling with some friends. It really is nice just to get your hair and nails done some days. AND, my hair is now long enough that I can style it again. THANK. GOD. Cutting my hair short was traumatic.
I then proceeded to spend the next two days in a cafe. Also, someone keeps letting the air out of my back tires. They are going to be the cause of my death... mostly bc I didn't check on my birthday and then drove on the highway. I felt the car moving underneath me. Scary.
Otherwise, the older I get, the better birthdays get. I go so many great cards from friends and little gifts that made my day. <3
SO many other things... but sleep is so close.
Wednesday, November 13, 2013
Friday, October 25, 2013
So many classy things.
Within the last 24 hours, I attented the Seattle Symphony and the Burke Musuem. Although I am a poor law student, I am able to venture in the classy lifestyle because I did both of these things for free.
And, in order to maintain my sanity, I will be going pumpkin picking on the morrow. :)
And, in order to maintain my sanity, I will be going pumpkin picking on the morrow. :)
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
Living in California could be so frustrating on days when you just needed a break from the sun and needed an overcast day so that you didn't feel guilty about processing feelings of sadness.
Perhaps that is why I like Seattle so much. My meloncholic demeanor is so in place with the early morning mist or fog. When I walk through the fog at 6:30am, I feel like I am paving a path through my emotional state. Surprisingly, it is often sunny by the afternoon and one can receive a healthy dose of Vitamin D.
To distract myself from some of the monotany of being in the library for the majority of my time, I have decided to write lyrical masterpieces based on law concepts covered in class. There is a serious lack of humor in law school. Okay, maybe there is humor but it is degrading humor and that is just not my jam. I need humor that is funny but not based on someone else's expense.
Perhaps that is why I like Seattle so much. My meloncholic demeanor is so in place with the early morning mist or fog. When I walk through the fog at 6:30am, I feel like I am paving a path through my emotional state. Surprisingly, it is often sunny by the afternoon and one can receive a healthy dose of Vitamin D.
To distract myself from some of the monotany of being in the library for the majority of my time, I have decided to write lyrical masterpieces based on law concepts covered in class. There is a serious lack of humor in law school. Okay, maybe there is humor but it is degrading humor and that is just not my jam. I need humor that is funny but not based on someone else's expense.
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
Walking over Freeways
When it isn't raining very hard in the morning, I love to walk to the law building. I usually get to the library around 7am. This is the time in the morning when the sun is just starting to come up, but the city is still half asleep. My favorite part of the walk is the I-5 overpass on 45th Street. If you look to the right you can still see the skyline of downtown with most of the lights shimmering.
Also, I have always loved just standing on bridges and looking down at the cars that pass underneath. Who are those people, where are they going, how is their morning going? So many individual lives can pass beneath you in a matter of minutes.
It's like you don't even matter; the world matters but you are just a spectator. Be silent and just watch it. You can feel it and take it in, but don't force yourself into it.
"Just accept. Just notice. Just appreciate."
Song of the day
Also, I have always loved just standing on bridges and looking down at the cars that pass underneath. Who are those people, where are they going, how is their morning going? So many individual lives can pass beneath you in a matter of minutes.
It's like you don't even matter; the world matters but you are just a spectator. Be silent and just watch it. You can feel it and take it in, but don't force yourself into it.
"Just accept. Just notice. Just appreciate."
Song of the day
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Law School
Yesterday was my first day of law school. I was stressed for 75 percent of the day. Do you ever have days when you just want to go home and not talk to anyone because all of your energy has been spent? That was how I felt. It wasn't because I had engaged in really active things, it was because I had such a heightened anxiety level. Over the next few weeks, I really need to brainstorm some ways that I can calm myself down within a class.
Also, during my first class, I answered a question before my professor finished the question. It turns out the last two words were qualifiers for what he wanted, and I didn't have an exact example and thus left him silent for a few seconds. THE ONLY ONE THAT DAY. Woo, what a great first impression. This left me stressed the rest of the day. AND, I become frustrated when we can't follow the schedule in class and since everyone wanted to show how intelligent they were, we barely got through two slides in that class... they were 19 in total. Yeah. I am a firm believer in having a solid base of knowledge before delving into a world of hypotheticals. the professor was trying to teach use how to approah those f'in crazy situations that you posed, but you wouldn't let him finish.
I also realized that I am one of the youngest people in law school, and thus it is okay to not have as much background knowledge. So good to be 23 and starting this path. I learn so much every day. Yet, it's stressful so I bought myself a gluten-free vanilla mini-cake to celebrate completing my first day as I watched trashy tv. (Don't worry, I went to the gym first...)
Saturday, September 14, 2013
Today? The Best Day
"What day is it?"
"It's today," squeaked Piglet.
"My favorite day," said Pooh.
Saturday rainy mornings give me a chance to catch up on the news and on updating myself on the blogs I use to re-center myself. This morning I had the pleasure of a common thread. I love the idea that you can treat every day as something marvelous and new. If you just stop, put your mind to the side, and appreciate the beauty or humor in the small things than you can smile. Sometimes people say I have a sardonic smile, but I am just trying to analyze something while maintaining a positive outlook. If the situation is negative I try to think what I can do to improve my surroundings. Yesterday, I was riding the bus to Pike Place Market to take some pictures of the fish market. After a few stops, a few people sat in all the seats around me. For some reason, I couldn't stop smiling at the bright green Sounders jerseys or the man who took part of a newspaper to wipe the blood of his ankle. I also noticed that there was newspaper all over. When I got up to leave, I picked up all of the newspaper and waited for my stop. Everyone started talking to each other about the Sounders game in the back of the bus when I left. Before, we were all looking at each other but weren't exchanging any words. I loved listening to the shift in conversation.
There is this Project called the Best Day Project started by a young woman in San Francisco. For the majority of her lived life, she had been suicidal. When she turned 24 she vowed to turn things around. She wrote out 365 things that she would love to day and every day she chooses one from a bowl and makes it the BEST DAY EVER. Some of the tasks are time consuming and large endeavors, but some consist of the mundane everyday things that can be great depending on how you approach them. Could you imagine what life would be like if you approached every moment as if it was a great journey that you were embarking on.
What would your outfit be? Would you bring any essential tools?
We can make everyday a favorite day for a different reason. It doesn't make it less special, it makes it different.
"It's today," squeaked Piglet.
"My favorite day," said Pooh.
Saturday rainy mornings give me a chance to catch up on the news and on updating myself on the blogs I use to re-center myself. This morning I had the pleasure of a common thread. I love the idea that you can treat every day as something marvelous and new. If you just stop, put your mind to the side, and appreciate the beauty or humor in the small things than you can smile. Sometimes people say I have a sardonic smile, but I am just trying to analyze something while maintaining a positive outlook. If the situation is negative I try to think what I can do to improve my surroundings. Yesterday, I was riding the bus to Pike Place Market to take some pictures of the fish market. After a few stops, a few people sat in all the seats around me. For some reason, I couldn't stop smiling at the bright green Sounders jerseys or the man who took part of a newspaper to wipe the blood of his ankle. I also noticed that there was newspaper all over. When I got up to leave, I picked up all of the newspaper and waited for my stop. Everyone started talking to each other about the Sounders game in the back of the bus when I left. Before, we were all looking at each other but weren't exchanging any words. I loved listening to the shift in conversation.
There is this Project called the Best Day Project started by a young woman in San Francisco. For the majority of her lived life, she had been suicidal. When she turned 24 she vowed to turn things around. She wrote out 365 things that she would love to day and every day she chooses one from a bowl and makes it the BEST DAY EVER. Some of the tasks are time consuming and large endeavors, but some consist of the mundane everyday things that can be great depending on how you approach them. Could you imagine what life would be like if you approached every moment as if it was a great journey that you were embarking on.
What would your outfit be? Would you bring any essential tools?
We can make everyday a favorite day for a different reason. It doesn't make it less special, it makes it different.
Scribbling Love Letters on Whiteboards
Dear Em,
Tonight I spent hours scouring the internet for the perfect quote to fill the better half of my whiteboard. I wanted to find something that I could read every morning for the next few days or weeks and I would fill full and ready to take on whatever I faced in the world. My whiteboard quotes are very important to me. They remind me to be kind to everyone I meet, despite my struggles because I have no idea what their personal battle looks like. They remind me the hardest part of the day is choosing what mindset that you are going to face the world with. After all of my searching, I settled on the quote you sent me. I wrote it in cursive, in pink. The first few words are fifty percent bigger than the rest. When I finished the first two lines I realized that if I continued to write that large that I wouldn't fit the entire text. But I kept the disproportionality. Love is the biggest word. It reminds me that I am not perfect, but it doesn't matter. Our love is a choice. The qualities that bind us together wil never fit into a geometric shape perfectly, but they fit us.
No one has given me quotes to fill my whiteboard before, except my good friend Marta, but that's different. She has the same habit. You just gave me material to make me smile throughout my day. I didn't prompt you.
When you gave me lilies, you sent me a card that said "I dare you to love me." I want to tell you that I am taking that dare. I'm taking that dare because it is the least risky dare I have ever had to take in the name of love. I'm taking that dare because to me it really isn't a dare at all.
I trust you. Never before have I trusted anyone that I loved. This is what has always been missing.
Em, I don't need you. I trust you and choose you to be the one I love. I know that I will not be the only one carrying this relationship. I know that we can walk together equally and that if one of us needed help, the other would be there to support them. You are capable, kind, joyful, observant, thoughtful, and supportive. Your work ethic and playfulness ensure that you could provide a stable life with many unforgetable moments.
You inspire growth and give me great material for my whiteboards. Pictures of you may not line my walls, but your words line the curves of my spirit throughout the day.
Love,
Crystal
Tonight I spent hours scouring the internet for the perfect quote to fill the better half of my whiteboard. I wanted to find something that I could read every morning for the next few days or weeks and I would fill full and ready to take on whatever I faced in the world. My whiteboard quotes are very important to me. They remind me to be kind to everyone I meet, despite my struggles because I have no idea what their personal battle looks like. They remind me the hardest part of the day is choosing what mindset that you are going to face the world with. After all of my searching, I settled on the quote you sent me. I wrote it in cursive, in pink. The first few words are fifty percent bigger than the rest. When I finished the first two lines I realized that if I continued to write that large that I wouldn't fit the entire text. But I kept the disproportionality. Love is the biggest word. It reminds me that I am not perfect, but it doesn't matter. Our love is a choice. The qualities that bind us together wil never fit into a geometric shape perfectly, but they fit us.
No one has given me quotes to fill my whiteboard before, except my good friend Marta, but that's different. She has the same habit. You just gave me material to make me smile throughout my day. I didn't prompt you.
When you gave me lilies, you sent me a card that said "I dare you to love me." I want to tell you that I am taking that dare. I'm taking that dare because it is the least risky dare I have ever had to take in the name of love. I'm taking that dare because to me it really isn't a dare at all.
I trust you. Never before have I trusted anyone that I loved. This is what has always been missing.
Em, I don't need you. I trust you and choose you to be the one I love. I know that I will not be the only one carrying this relationship. I know that we can walk together equally and that if one of us needed help, the other would be there to support them. You are capable, kind, joyful, observant, thoughtful, and supportive. Your work ethic and playfulness ensure that you could provide a stable life with many unforgetable moments.
You inspire growth and give me great material for my whiteboards. Pictures of you may not line my walls, but your words line the curves of my spirit throughout the day.
Love,
Crystal
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